Glee - 'I do'

Yaaay Valentine's Day.. I realize that it's almost a month after, I am finally catching up. Finn is really upset and is talking to Rachel about how he smooched Emma out of the blue - remember that?? The neckline on his shirt is looking like a priest's collar and it's distracting me. Rachel thinks it's because he's upset over her and Brody and he finally sets her straight - 'Not everything is about you!' HAHA! That's my boy! :P
Emma is freaking out and tells Finn to get over it because she has other things on her mind - like which of the incestuously-dating Glee kids can tolerate one another - and Will's back!!
Everyone is wearing pink, red, and maroon hahaha except for Finn and Ryder lol - I find this weird. Strategic costuming plan, or random coincidence that they're both single? The theme of their assignment is a wedding, and Will wants Finn to sing instead of giving a best man speech. Which is good, because Finn's not so good with the words.
Emma is cleaning Artie's locker and telling him who he'll be sitting next to at the wedding. Then Marley gives Jake a really cute gift - cufflinks she made for him of his initials from an old typewriter!! And he says she'll love her gift from him - and then he admits to Ryder that he hasn't bought one later. He says he's been talking to Puck for ideas, and Ryder says 'I know you're related to that guy, but he's kind of creepy'. HAHAHA!! So he suggests that he make it Valentine's Week instead of Day. Aww!!
Rachel meets with Finn (late, because the diva was getting a spray tan) and they decide to sing together at the wedding, and then she bites her lip and says he looks cute, and I roll my eyes. That girl. Like seriously.
And then they're in History (which I was unaware Mr. Schue taught - when did that happen?) and Jake comes in wearing a ridiculous red tux and Ryder says 'Oh my goodness, are you about to sing to Marley to declare your love in front of a whole class? That's so brave and emotionally vulnerable, I had no idea - oh wait, I did!' HAHAHA I love that guy he's adorable and hilarious! Then everyone shows up and they sing 'You're All I Need to Get By' and she joins them, naturally. But when the song ends, there's a closeup of Ryder and he looks sad, lonely, jealous - and a little bit like a brown-eyed John Travolta. Something about his chin and sideburns.



I know Blaine's got the greaser hair down, but maybe his lookalike status is another reason Ryder was cast as Danny in Grease...

At the wedding, Santana and Quinn discuss how much weddings, Valentine's Day, and men suck (in that order).

Blaine and Kurt are making out in a car, and I would like to steal a line from Friends' Phoebe here: "OH MY GOD!!! YOU GUYS KISSED!! THIS IS A HUGE DEAL!!! WHAT DOES THIS MEAN??!!!" They're interrupted by Mercedes tapping on the window and telling them she needs her arm-gays.

There are flowers on Marley's pew - peonies, her favourite (but I definitely saw some roses and calla lillies in that bouquet, too!), she assumes they're from Jake, and everyone acts like they are, but it's clear that was Ryder's doing. Poor guy.

Arty meets the aforementioned Betty, who is apparently Emma's neice (I didn't catch that before) and is also in a wheelchair, and she turns him down oh-so-rudely because he's not 'nerd-hot like Andrew Garfield'. 

Bullshit!! He's adorable!!!



And he's not nerd-hot, he's just normal hot.

Emma is getting ready but freaks out and then Sue shows up wearing an exact replica of Emma's wedding dress, because, somehow, that's a way to get revenge on Will. Also, I would like to point out that this is her third marriage in 4 years - that's really fast, even for TV. Even for Ross. I love being able to work Friends references into everything. But this dress is much more 'her' than the first one she had.. It was weird, I always thought it was on backwards. 

Remember guys? This one? It's weird, right?

MUUUUUCH better! Very Kate Middleton. But with pouffy skirt.

Everyone starts singing about marriage - Emma very fast - and Will looks all excited, and I'm pretty sure it's something from a musical. She then takes off and runs outside the church like a spy, hiding behind pillars and stuff, then hops into a cab. WHAAAAT??!!!!

Brad the piano guy (remember, the one who hates the Glee kids?) is playing te organ, and Becky storms down the aisle as flower girl - then it's SUE coming through the door! THAT BITCH!!!! She says she's trying 'to stop this from being an utter fiasco' and tells him that Emma's taken off.

Now the church is empty and Finn and Will are sitting talking, and both of them clearly feel responsible for what happened, until Santana comes in (dressed like a hooker, complete with fur stole) and says that the Pilsburys want the reception to continue. So Finn goes to join the glee peeps at the party, and Will goes to try to find Emma. Wow, a lot of these 'close friends and family' don't seem to care that Will and Emma are gone/ sad. Quinn and Santana get drunk and talk about how much better they are than everyone else. 

I see their egos have not taken a hit at all...

Clearly Blaine and Kurt have been apart for a really long time, because their dance moves are horribly out of sync. And Tina's glaring at them the whole time.

Ryder got another gift for Marley - a necklace, which she loves, and Jake thinks he's going to get laid that night and so Ryder gets all horrified. Finn and Rachel decide to dance together, and Artie's 'sweet moves' win over Betty for one dance.

What follows is an adorable montage to a horrible song, of everyone dancing, except Tina who is glowering, and then when the boys are done singing she confronts Kurt and he tells her off that she's 'creepy' and she tells him how she's been there for Blaine and including putting Vapo-rub on his chest while he was asleep. Then Kurt is all "What? You Vapo-Raped my boyfriend? Don't you walk away from me!!"

Sue decides to throw the pilfered bouquet, and Rachel catches it - because, after all, everything is about her. Then Finn follows her out of the room and says 'you only would have caught that if you were single' and then she dodges every one of his questions by saying she and Brody aren't really together - while he drunkenly does the 'she loves me, she loves me not' thing with a daisy.

And then they go to sing, and all the couples go upstairs into different rooms, including Rachel and Finn, Sam and Britney, Kurt and Blaine, Quinn and Santana (!) and Artie and Betty - who, of course, can sing too! Marley and Jake do too, but apparently don't 'do' anything, and she feels bad. Blaine thinks he and Kurt are going to get back together, Kurt disagrees.

Rachel sneaks out while Finn is asleep, goes back to New York to find that Brody has COVERED their apartment with flowers, streamers, confetti, sparkly things... And he says he spent the last 2 nights alone but a flashback tells otherwise - he was leaving a hotel room with a bunch of cash. I'M SUSPICIOUS! Then they have an 'open relationship' talk and she admits she kissed Finn and says it didn't mean anything. BITCH!

Kurt and Blaine are adorable and cheer Tina up about her singleness, and then Marley goes to thank Ryder for everything, because she knew it was him, and then when she says "whoever you do that for for real will be the luckiest girl in the world," he says "That was for real" And KISSES HER! IN THE SCHOOL HALLWAY!! IN FRONT OF PEOPLE!!! As much as I have wanted that to happen FOREVER, it is GOING TO END BADLY!!!!!!

He apologizes, she takes off, and then apparently no one notices, but he looks really sad.

Finn takes Mr. Schue's coffee, tells him to stop moping, and that he's going to help him find Emma and coach the New Directions to a national championship. Still no word about that kiss.

Betty shows up at the school (because apparently in the USA, random people can just randomly walk - or roll in her case - into random schools that are not their own) and apologizes to Artie for being bitchy to him when they first met, and that it was because she was nervous. He tells her 'Give me your digits, woman' so he can take her on a date, and then they roll off down the hall as he lists all the things they could do - like go to Paris and dance under the Arc d'Triomphe. 

I know that it's very Hollywood cliche, but I love that he has a girl who is at his eye level!! So cute :)

The gang all gets onstage and does an awesome rendition of Ellie Goulding's 'Anything Could Happen' - a song which, I must say, my favourite part of, is those background vocals... We used to play it at my work and I would jam out hahaha! But while they're all dancing and singing and wearing purple, Mr. Schue is looking at pictures of Emma on his phone and looking all sad... Then Marley and Ryder make awkward eye contact and they look uncomfortable, Jake notices and looks confused. And Rachel is shown in bed with Brodie looking through a personal planner and then she gets up and leaves.

Ryder is really flexible, he was almost in the splits at one point, and balloons fall from the ceiling and they all dance around in them. Aww...

And we see Rachel looking at a pregnancy test. HOLY CRAP!!!! Thank goodness I have another episode to watch after this, because I COULD NOT HAVE BEEN ABLE TO STAND THAT CLIFFHANGER!!!!

SNL - Justin Timberlake

OMG OMG OMGO MOGMGIOMGOMGOGMG
I have been so excited about this episode for so long, it was the one thing I was looking forward to all day today!! While I was doing stupid studying and labs and stuff - JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE!!!
Singing (as Elton John) in the cold open, about the death of Hugo Chavez. This man is so great... And so are the people who wrote that parody song!! AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT!!! Haha very few people get to do the cold open on their own episode of this show, congrats Justin buddy!!
He's also one of the very few people to host 5 times! So now he's a member of a very exclusive club, including Paul Simon, Steve Martin - who thinks JT isn't impressive enough because he doesn't play banjo!
OMG DAN AKROYD IS THEIR BARTENDER!!! SO MANY CAMEOS I CAN'T EVEN!!! He has so much of his own vodka behind him haha Shameless Self Promotion.. CHEVY CHASE TOO!!!! I LOVE THIS!!!!! AND MARTIN SHORT!!! He's the only one who will do the 'three amigos salute', AND ALEC BALDWIN JUST WALKED IN WITH TOM HANKS!!!!! I'm glad I'm not in the studio audience, I would have had a heart attack by now.

SO MUCH FAMOUSNESS IN ONE ROOM!!!!!

They get to make the cast members fight for their entertainment, and Bobby kills Taran, but Tom loves 'Drunk Uncle' haha so Bobby's over it! AND CANDACE BERGEN!!! 'We got a great show - EVERYBODY is here!!!' I am so incredibly happy :) The next sketch is a dating show, and if my roommate wasn't going to bed right now, I would have literally SCREAMED because Bachelor Number(s) 2 on this show is ANDY SAMBERG AND JUSTIN AS THE 'DICK IN A BOX/MOTHERLOVER/THREE WAY' GUYS!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!

They're singing all the answers, and I'm squealing because it's so awesome!!!

The 3rd bachelors are apparently a recurring characters from back in the day, it's Steve and Akroyd as Czech/Long Islandian twins! Also Bill is the host, so he's hilarious, of course. And no one wants to hear what poor Bobby (Bachelor #1) has to say.
Apparently Melissa McCarthy is hosting next week, that'll be good! She's always funny!
I CAN'T EVEN!!! I'M SO HAPPY!!!!! Too bad they couldn't get Will Forte to come back, but Bobby is a street hawker for sausages, and JUSTIN IS IN A GIANT BLOCK OF TOFU COSTUME 'Bring it on down to veganville!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' THIS IS THE GREATEST EPISODE OF ANYTHING EVER!!!!!!!!!!! And then 'We found love in a meatless place - dance break, I wish I had some glowsticks' THEN he breaks into the best Billy Idol impression I've ever seen... I'm just going to sit back and be happy that this is happening!!! AND THEN HE MANAGES TO TURN IT INTO A HARLEM SHAKE OH MY GOD I'M DYING 

BRING IT ON DOWN TO VEGANVILLE!!!!!

The next fauxmercial was kind of disturbing, it was about a bedazzled birth control ring.. uhmm..
AW there was a real commercial involving a panda and a comedian I love.. Named Mark Little.. Google him, he's hilarious and nerdy and therefore, I love him.
Then he introduced himself lol that's a first... I love him so much... His Grammy performance was better. However, it would be incredibly hard to top that, let's be honest. It was that good. And now even MORE famous people in one building, because suddenly Jay-Z is there!!
YAY SETH MEYERS!!! Apparently the richest man in Mexico is worth $73 billion, which works out to infinity pesos.
THE OFFICIAL BEST EPISODE EVER JUST BECAME TOTALLY 100% OFFICIAL BECAUSE STEPHON IS ON WEEKEND UPDATE!!!! BILL HADER DESERVES ALL THE EMMYS!!!! AND THEY'RE BOTH LAUGHING!!!!

I apologize for the overuse of caps lock, because I am just THAT HAPPY!!! AND HE JUST DID A DONALD DUCK IMPERSONATION, LITERALLY THE ONLY WAY I COULD BE HAPPIER IS IF I DIDN'T HAVE MIDTERMS NEXT WEEK!!!! What is a human fannypack? Me: You have a midget around your waist who holds your stuff Stephon: It's that thing, where a midget dangles from your waist and holds your passport in his mouth.
And he has 2 questions for Seth: 'Will you go to Spring Break with me? And why not?'
I LOVE THEM SO MUCH I COULD CRY!!!!!
Next (I can't believe it's already 12:30) is a sketch about the debaucherous Calligula who is trying to stop being an alcoholic sex addict lol.. It's 'The Tales of Sober Calligula'! He wants everyone to play Celebrity
Remember Maine Justice? Vaguely? Me too... ANDY IS BACK as the defendant, a lady claimed to have injured herself - and Justin is the bailiff. He and Jason (the judge) are all angsty and acting like they're in Louisianna - but 'We don't take kindly to southern folk' haha and they sentence him to eat donuts.. Lord, I miss Andy Samberg.. Although he's been on 2 episodes already, so it's like he's just popping in and out! So I'm ok with that!
AND HE GOT THE 3 AMIGOS TO INTRODUCE HIM THE SECOND TIME!!!! This song is incredible, I love it!! 

Screw you, Beiber - THIS MAN is the next Michael Jackson!!!

Then a sketch about a fake movie where Justin is in love with Nasim, and Keenan is his friend, and it looks like a normal movie except - the girl has a dick. Typical SNL lol...
Here's that thing again where Vanessa and Cecily are ex porn stars advertising that champagne hahah and Justin keeps sliding in, looking like a creeper hahaha and the name is Moet & Chandon champagne but he calls it 'Monica and Chandler'
He's going to run out of breath thanking all those famous people... Wow this was just awesome!! And I can't wait to see him on Jimmy Fallon all this week!!!! Except I have to study... Poop.

Bones - 'The Survivor in the Soap'

I'm eating dinner with one hand, and typing with the other. Pardon the short sentences.
Brennan and Booth are trying to figure out a place to go on vacation, but can't agree, because she wants an educational destination, and he wants a fun one. Christine is no help.
A dude is found in a barrell, encased in soap, because apparently the body was covered with potassium hydroxide, which would turn the body's fat into soap. The victim is identified as a teenage refugee, who was reported missing by a suspicious voice from a gas station payphone.
Vasiri is back, and this is funny because it's the first episode he's been in since his relationship with Cam was revealed.
Angela feels awkward about knowing about it, and Hodgins BEGS her not to let on that she knows.
Vasiri uses an industrial dishwasher to clean off the bones, which causes a lot of bubbles, and while that's happening, he and Cam have an adorable conversation about their relationship, and how 'loving her is the easiest thing ever'.

STOP STOP STOP IT!!! I CAN'T HANDLE ALL THE CUTENESS!!!!

Booth and Bones go to interview an immigration lawyer who is volunteering with the Sierra Leonean refugee children such as the victim. Also, the 'little man' Alex from the State Department is back. The lawyer guy says that the victim, Symchay, had a friend who had been deported back to Sierra Leone, but was back in the US illegally, and crashing on Symchay's couch. He was probably the one who had called and reported Symchay missing.
Vasiri and Brennan discover that Symchay was a child soldier. He came to the US to escape that life, and graduated from culinary school a few months before his death. Then they find a cheque that was deposited into his bank account from an art gallery. When they talk to the owner, she says that she had hired him, as a chef, to cater the opening of the new photo exhibit about the war in Sierra Leone. She says she only met him a few days before he disappeared, to take him around the gallery and plan for the event. When he saw the photos, she said, he broke down and began crying, and then ran off.
Brennan sees one photo in particular, of a child soldier holding a semiautomatic weapon, standing with a man over the body of another dead child. Booth and the photographer are shocked when she recognises the boy in the photo as Symchay. 

Of course I'd heard of this kind of thing before, but when Bones
 brings up such issues, it makes it very visible and sad.

The photographer had a large amount of Potassium hyroxide she used to develop her photos, but it wasn't enough to dissolve the body. She also suffered from PTSD after seeing the conditions in Sierra Leone.
The team finds the illegal immigrant friend, he was in fact the one who made the 911 call, and he is now working as a taxi driver at the company whose garage the phone call was made from.
He's also missing his left hand, ecause when he was younger, a group of rebels came to his school, and when he refused to hill his teacher, they made him watch while they did it, and then they cut off his hand. Oh god, this is just horrible. He swears that he didn't kill Symchay, because they were friends, and that he didn't start the fight that led to his deportation, he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. For once, Alex is on the same side as Booth and Bones, because he says he hopes "the kid is telling the truth - I don't wan't to be the one to send him back to his death".
Hodgins finds something demonstrating how Symchay was killed, but it doesn't make sense, he thinks that he was stabbed with an AK-47. For some reason, this causes Vasiri to FLIP out... He screams at Hodgins, and belittles the 'hard' childhood of an American kid. Then he keeps going on about how it was 'hell'. Cam interrupts and asks him what's wrong, but he puts on a straight face and tells her he'll apologize to Hodgins and stay professional.
Bones and Booth take the friend to the gallery to look at the photos and try to figure out what Symchay saw that upset him so much. Then he sees a photo of a man and starts freaking out, then Booth joins him in freaking out, because he recognises the guy. The photographer says that he's Joseph Mbarga, a monster responsible for training and killing thousands of child soldiers. Booth says he's the janitor at Symchay's building. There are dozens of war-crime warrants out for Mbarga, but he went into hiding.

Remind you of anyone? I wish they'd found the bastard...

When they take him in, his fingerprints are a match, and Booth posits that Symchay recognised him and threatened to turn him in to the authorities. Angela matches his voice print as well, to a radio broadcast from years earlier. They find that Symchay was stabbed with a 2-pronged something symbolically made out of an AK-47. And Bones realises she saw it, a horned mask hanging in the office of the lawyer from earlier. They go and confront him (naturally he denies it) but they realise that he'd helped smuggle Mbarga into the country under a fake name, in return for lots of money. When they take the lawyer away in handcuffs (Bones and Alex tell him they hope he dies in prison), the refugees at the community center look really sad, so Bones explains to them in their language that Alex had helped take away the bad men, and that he was going to help them and the others hoping to flee from their country. So they all become happy and run over to hug him and shake his hand. Awwe...
Vasiri finally tells Cam what's going on, and apparently when he was a child, during the Persian Gulf War, there were 96, 000 child soldiers in the war, and his cousin was one of them, and got killed. She hugs him, and Bones, Angela and Hodgins all see. So they admit that they are dating, which causes Bones to be surprised (Angela actually had to whisper to her what was going on) and Hodgins to applaud, even though no one else will, because he's 'a romantic'. I love these people.

Bones - 'The Fact in the Fiction'

Not to be a big plot-spoiler or anything, but the episode begins with a guy on a big soil-turner on a farm of some kind, and I'm guessing he finds a body. Seriously, they're running out of ways for people to find corpses on this show!
Sure enough, while talking on Bluetooth to someone about how he's out of the stock-trading game, he unearths a body - and then somehow runs over it again. EW! Oh, and then he screams. I feel bad for whoever was on the other end of that phone call. "AHHH!!! I just killed a dead guy!!" (I don't think that's possible..)
Booth is talking to Bones about how they should invest in astroid mining. She's totally pissed and then Hodgins makes matters worse when he's all gung-ho about the idea. Apparently the victim was a hispanic male, and he was killed 5 days before, the body was ravaged by coyotes because of the shallow grave, and the head was missing.
Booth and Brennan are in the diner, when a guy covered in dirt and blood rushes in, asking for her, and says 'I have something for you' so when he reaches into his bag, Booth pulls his gun on him, and everyone in the diner freaks out. With all the times that place has been shot up, and all the cops in there, you'd think the patrons would know he's an FBI agent..
What the guy pulls out is the vicitm's head, and then he says "Hi. I'm your new intern." QUITE the entrance, my man!  

Welcome to the jungle, Dr. Oliver Wells.. Hope you can handle it!

Apparently he found the skull by tracking it to a coyote den 6 miles from the dump site, and Brennan didn't know about him because she didn't read any of the numerous emails Cam sent her about hiring a new intern. He has a BAZILION doctorates, and has also passed the bar. Damn impressive.
Hodgins starts talking about zombies, and Wells agrees that ghosts might exist, so Hodgins asks 'can we keep him?!' So cute!

Booth thinks Sweets can handle a pack of coyotes.

Sweets has a very girly comeback to this, saying "I'm sure you could just break their hearts, with your mean, mean words!" Ahahaha those two. Apparently there was glow-in-the-dark auto paint in the victim Benji's nose, which traced to his brother's auto shop. Apparently his truck is also missing, and the other guys at the auto shop think his ex-girlfriend killed him. Wells asks Hodgins if he'd rather have a beetle's brain in his body, or his brain in a beetle's body. Hodgins says the latter, which apparently 'reveals' a lot about him - we sure one of those doctorates isn't in psychology? They also determine that Benji was hit on the head with something, but that's not what killed him.
Booth and Sweets interview the girlfriend, who says that they only recently broke up. When asked if Benji dumped her, or had cheated on her, she repeatedly gestures to herself and says 'he couldn't find anything hotter than this' - causing Sweets to make an 'I'm trying very hard not to laugh right now' face and causing me to actually laugh. Out loud. Very hard. 

JFD is an even better actor than I thought, I wouldn't have been able
to get through that scene without cracking up.

The girlfriend, Courtney, says that Benji was obsessed with 2 things (other than her) - time travel, and his truck. She thought time travel was a good idea because it would make them tons of money, but she resented his love of his truck.
Dr. Wells uses string cheese to help him think, which doesn't impress Bones, even though he discovered that the victim had scoliosis. I like him! I don't know why she's so grumpy! It's not like she's having to replace Zack again! She throws out his string cheese, and he pulls out a second one from his pocket. I'm upgrading that 'like' sentence to LOVE HIM!
Hodgins, naturally, is impressed, with Benji's work with time-travel. Apparently Benji was trying to go back in time, and Hodgins says if he could pick a time to go back to, it'd be the day that he met Angela. AWWW!!! She says the same, but sort-of-hesitates, making me think she was lying. He was also working with a Professor Hunter at a different school, a theoretical physicist, that they're going to have to look into - and then Hodgins says 'those theoretical physicists can be pretty weird'.

Yes, yes they can be.

Sweets says exactly what I was thinking, that probably Benji wanted to go back in time to stop his father from walking out on his family when he was a kid. This makes me sad, and then Sweets makes me more sad when he says that he'd like to travel back in time to visit the family that adopted him, because they saved his life and he wants them to know how much it meant to him. 

Damnit Sweets!! Why are you always so heartbreaking!!

Booth uncovers that the professor was actually fired from a different university 2 years before, for electrocuting a student. Suspicious? I think so.
Back in the lab, Oliver asks Bones 'would you rather be run over by one steamroller, or a thousand mopeds', which is awesome for 2 reasons - 1) it's clear that this 'would you rather' thing is going to become his trademark, and 2) it caused Bones to use the word 'preposterous'. YES! But then she asks if it's the same moped 1000 times, or 1000 mopeds simultaneously. And he proceeds to analyse her and then makes her mad by inadvertantly calling her narrow-minded. They find evidence of cracked ribs, indicating the victim could have been electrocuted. Coincidence? I think not!
When she and Booth are in the car on their way to interview the professor, she tells him about what Wells said about her, and admit that he might be right about her being narrow-minded. This revelation causes Booth to make his own version of the 'I'm trying really hard not to laugh' face from before.

He's less successful.

The dynamic duo find exposed wiring in the professor's so-called 'laboratory', which is connected to a 240-V battery, more than enough to kill someone.
Hodgins and his 'brother from another mother' (his words) use the huge battery to electrocute a set of fake ribs in a cube of gel. This makes the gel explode and covers them both in goop. But it doesn't crack any ribs.
Cam and Angela are talking about the whole time-travel thing, and apparently Cam's number-one choice in her lifetime would be to go back and spend more time with Angela's ex-husband Birumbau (weird, I was just watching the episode with him last night!) and Angela says the same thing, and they giggle but clam up when Hodgins walks in. He said he has found soil in Benji's shoes that indicate a strawberry farm in line with the route Benji took travelling out of town (based on some ATMs he stopped at). Inconsistent, however, with this line, is the location where his body was found. Hodgins, Wells, and Cam do a second experiment where they shoot the gel, because the hydrostatic shock waves from this caused the cracks in the ribs.
When Booth and Bones get to the strawberry farm, they find the house is boarded up, but someone has broken into the barn - where they find Benji's truck, and a second body! When Brennan points out all the characteristics of the victim - Hispanic male, shot in the torso, hit on the forehead - Booth responds to each with "just like Benji". When they get it back to the lab, they find that he is older, and Wells theorizes that the second body is Benji from the future, and present Benji traveled forward in time and brought this Benji back, but when younger Benji was shot, older Benji then had to take a bullet to avoid changing reality. 

*Ahem* Both worked with crazy old professors, both had awesome cars...
Anyone else seeing a parallel here??

This is too complicated, I was just thinking that it was his father... Then he says that "Just because something is impossible, doesn't mean that it's not theoretically possible" and she responds with "I believe that's exactly what it means..."
Booth also thinks that Wells is a nut job, but Bones is now in agreement with the possibility. A call from Wells interrupts their lunch, and he says he's found that the older man also suffered from scoliosis, which is a hereditary condition. Cam comes in with the DNA findings - they are in fact father and son.
When they tell this to the brother, he's in shock, because neither of them knew about the father's whereabouts, and also he says that Benji was so young when the father left, that they told him the dad had died, to make it less hard on him than the truth of their father being a druggie and a deadbeat. Bones theorises that if the father was in trouble with a dealer, then he could have reached out to Benji for money, and therefore gotten them both killed.
Angela tells Wells that she thinks he's arrogant and, I quote, to "try being less of a douche". He responds super-charmingly, and then they figure out that the father and son were shot with one lying on top of the other, and their heads knocked together, causing the dents.
Booth says if he could, he would go back in time and save President Lincoln from being shot. Which is weird, because he's a relative of John Wilkes Booth. And if he did that, he might have never been born. Bones says that she wouldn't go anywhere in time, because she had everything she wanted right now. Aww!  

Which is cuter - Bones' mushiness, or these kitties??

They discover that there was a guy who worked at the car shop that sold heroin years before. He had a baton that matched the injuries on Felix (the father's) kneecaps, but this injury is weeks old. Then they find injuries on Benji's legs that happened from being his at a 45-degree angle - an angle they find on the doors of a DELORIAN in the brother's garage. He confesses to killing them, because his deadbeat father wanted to take Benji's college money to buy drugs. Benji was an accident, he just got in the way. How sad.
Bones tells Dr. Wells that he should go home, and then they talk about how there's no such thing as luck, and she somehow makes him feel stupid, then he asks 'are you saying I'm lacking?' When she asks him about the asteroid mining, he says it's a good idea, and she trusts him.
Back at home, Booth points out that she is smarter than Dr. Wells, and she is confused for a moment, but happy. Then he points out that she should have seen his asteroid-mining projects as a good idea from day one, and this therefore makes him the smarter one - a statement to which she has no comeback.
This episode was awesome. And I just have one thing to say -  

CAN WE PLEASE KEEP HIM???!!!!!



SNL - Kevin Hart & Macklemore and Ryan Lewis

Obama is trying to explain budget cuts to the American people. Michelle is only able to do 4 TV appearances a week, down from her usual of 75. The austronauts are not going to have glass in their space helmets anymore, and at the national zoo, they're going to fire 3 monkeys by just letting them loose in the city. OMG YMCA REFERENCE!!!!! Sailors, police officers, construction workers, and Native Americans are all going to be affected by the budget cuts - so they all lined up in a row beside him and did the arm movements ehehehe 
To be honest, I didn't really know who Kevin Hart was, I thought he was a football player or something... But then I Googled him and realised he was a comedian. Weird. Sorry, Kevin. Apparently he auditioned for SNL a while ago (67 months ago) and was passed on for the show, which is surprising, considering his wonderful facial impression of Robert DeNiro!

I totally buy this. The resemblance is uncanny.

The next sketch is the Steve Harvey show - apparently he caught an audience volunteer on fire! And he is talking about phobias, but he pronounces it 'pho-bye-a' haha. The first guest is Kevin Hart, he's afraid of horses because he thinks they are going to steal his rings and they have knife-fingers under their hooves. So naturally, they bring out a fake horse for him to pet, and then Steve becomes afraid of it too ahaha these guys!!
YAAY it's 'The Situation Room' with 'Wolf Blitzer'!! I have never actually seen Wolf Blitzer in person, but I freaking LVE Sudeikis' impression of him!! They're covering the 'election' of the new Pope - apparently it's Quvenzhane Wallis. Right. What? I'm pretty sure there's a rule that Popes have to be a certain age... And also can't be girls. And then retired-Pope Benedict starts trying to do the 'muscleman' pose like Quvenzhane does - and then adds an 'oh no you didn't' but isn't cute enough!

I do like the idea of an adorable 9-year-old for Pope, though!!

Then they brought back the fauxmercial about the Starbucks home brewing system-thing that gets your order wrong and then bitches at you!!
Okay, Bobby and Cecily playing the obnoxious people who hate everyone they work with are back - this time working at a Chapters-esque bookstore. They bitch at two girls played by Vanessa and Kate for always being together - 'Are you 2 joined at the hip? Branch out more!' it turns out the 2 are conjoined twins, and Kate killed me with her line - 'We share a pancreas' haha the line's funny, but her deadpan delivery totally KILLED me!! Kevin is their manager, and he's actually firing the creepy old guy played by Tim, who then stands over his shoulder and nods vigorously - CAUSING KEVIN AND I TO BUST OUT LAUGHING!!!! YAY!!!
Macklemore and Ryan Lewis naturally played 'Thriftshop', it was awesome as always, and I still don't know all the lyrics, because every time I hear it, I immediately think of this one:

because I heard it before I heard the original, and it's hilarious, and I LOVE Down with Webster (they're an awesome Canadian band - check them out!)
Weekend update time!! Apparently Kim Jong Un (Bobby) is the tallest person in North Korea, and he and Dennis Rodman (Jay) are best friends!
Apparently the next season of Downton Abbey will feature the show's first black character, who - according to Seth - gets sent to live at Downton Abbey because:

"He got in one little fight, and his mom got scared" I'M DYING!!!

They also brought back the 'REALLY?!' segment with Seth - and Kevin, who kept flubbing his lines and it was hilarious! They're talking about racism in the southern States and how they're 'not as racist' anymore - but just because they're less racist than Mississippi in 1965, that's not saying much, it's like getting pulled over for a DUI and telling the cop 'I've been drunker!' THESE GUYS!! Kevin also mentioned that he's short, so I looked it up, and OH MY GOD HE'S THE SAME HIGHT AS ME!!! Dude is short...

You know that's right.

Now it's the Walking Dead and Kevin is a guy who wants to join the group, but while they're conferring on whether they should let him into the group, he gets bitten. And then when they notice he's turning into a zombie and accuse him, he says they're being racist! (I saw that coming as soon as he showed up to join them haha) then he goes to walk off and they go 'wait a minute, you didn't have a limp a minute ago!' he replies with 'what, you've never seen swag before??' LOVE IT!! Then his foot falls off - apparently due to 'diabetes' but they finally shoot him once he tries to attack them - and then when they move off, Bill says 'I knew we weren't racist!'
Now we have a Shark Tank fake-show, Tim suggested they invest in a 'slest', which is the exact opposite of a vest. Basically, he's wearing a collar and sleeves, with no shirt-part in the middle. And then Kevin's up, and keeps pronouncing it 'shork'
The next ridiculous sketch made me laugh so hard - it was a cheesy 90s-esque commercial about a 'new shirt' called the 'Zee-shirt' that's not a Tee-shirt, it's a 'ZEE-shirt!' (Or as we would say in Canada, 'zed-shirt'!) Basically it's a shirt that has a Z on it. And it comes in multiple colours! But Kevin doesn't know what letter it is, so he goes through the entire alphabet really enthusiastically, almost like Tracy Morgan haha and then Tim gets fed up and storms off like 'oh forget it'

The next song by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis was actually really good, I liked it, the one guy (whichever one was in the white suit jacket) is pretty cute.. And the other one was dancing like a crazy person, I loved it! And then he took off his jacket and OH GOD

No, Beiber wasn't back, thank goodness, but REMEMBER THAT AWFUL SHIRT??
(My friend added one more possible material to my list: garbage bag.)

It's the same freaking shirt!!! Who knew Beiber sold his stuff to a thrift store??!

When we came back from commercial, there was a funeral scene, and then Tim gets up to make a speech about his dead mother, and says 'do you have a question?' to someone off-camera, and then Kevin pops up and says 'Is it a W-shirt? Is it a Y-shirt??' AND I LOST IT!!! THEY NEVER DO THAT!!! Well, sometimes they have recurring sketches in one show (MacGruber, anyone?), but not where they set it up to be something entirely different and then bring in someone else!! I WAS DYING OF LAUGHTER!!

Yes. Yes it is.

I also loved the next sketch, it was a thing called the 360 news show, with a whole bunch of cameras where the anchor (Kevin) swivels to a different camera for each 'story' - which is only one sentence long. The idea alone is enough to make me laugh, but now the newsanchor has a neck brace so it's hurting him to change cameras (which doesn't make sense to me, since he is in a swively-chair, and doesn't need to turn his neck, just his body! And then when the producers tell him that he should just use the one camera, he gets really mad, and then asks all 5 camerapeople (including Jay, dangling from the ceiling) and they say that they all think the idea of the show s stupid - which makes no sense to me, because they wouldn't have a job if they said that... But oh well haha he flips out and gets mad at all of them. And that is the end of that episode!

Much better material than the last episode.



UNTIL NEXT WEEK!! OMG SO EXCITED YOU HAVE NO IDEA!!!!!!

Justin's bringing funny BAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!