Saturday Night Live - Amy Adams

I had a ton of stuff going on on Saturday, no time to watch. Now I'll try to be brief. 

Taran can do an excellent Sam Smith impersonation. Dr. Evil is back, and I love Mike Myers!!! He mocks the GOP, James Franco, and himself. And does the intro!!

Amy Adams is adorable!! Surprise Kristen Wiig is the best kind of Kristen Wiig!! The two of them could be sisters. One of those reindeer is missing his nose... And then his antlers fell off haha

Racially sensitive generic Asian doll makes for a funny fauxmercial.

Poor Kyle gets typecast as a child again - during a parody of that annoying viral-video-Christmas-card. This one:

Their son thinks he's a dog. And the daughter is a sociopath. And 'sweatpants' doesn't rhyme with anything.

They did a parody of Serial, which I've heard of but never listened to, about Santa Claus.

I always feel bad for Aidy during the 'Girlfriends Talk Show' sketch. Amy is so cute with blonde hair. But I like that they involved the musical guests (One Direction) in a sketch. My ears are ringing. Damn audience screaming.

Some guy keeps playing the Ghostbusters theme at an office Christmas party. Full disclosure, I have a Stay Puft Marshmallow Man ornament that plays that song.

Pete and Jay are kinda half rapping half singing. Pretty funny. But they're no Lonely Island.

UPDAAATE!!! They're talking about the blocking of The Interview from theaters. Michael keeps calling Kim-Jong Un 'Kimberley'. Cause that won't piss him off... And now Bobby is imitating him. Oh dear. Colin thinks it's a bad idea. I concur.
Michael makes fun of Colin again, Kenan pretends to be Michael's neighbour.
Garth and Kat are back. As much as I love Kirsten, I could do without Fred... Wish they'd bring Bill back. They also think they wrote the Hunger Games soundtrack.

Random people on Cuban TV - because the embargo has been lifted. I think Fred is the voiceover. As well as Castro. Which is odd, seeing him next to Jay as Obama.

I'm really confused by the next sketch. 1950s bar scene. Bobby has a terrible haircut. Kyle's 1950s voice is wonderful. Then the girls sing. And insist that they have to chew on garbage. Who the hell made this sketch??? Then they turn back into raccoons. WHY?!

Kate and Amy are a not-so-secretive couple, selling cats and they have REAL KITTIES!!! I love kitties. I think one of them really wanted to jump down from Kate's arms.

Big Bang Theory - The Clean Room Infiltration

I know this is incredibly late, and once again I'm sorry (Exams SUCK! At least they're done now!) but my dad told me there was an 'awww' moment in this episode, so... Better late than never!

Amy's hosting Christmas dinner, and we might actually get to see Raj's dad in person rather than on Skype!

Leonard and Howard let a pigeon into the clean room at the university which is bad - but they also aren't wearing gloves, I feel like that's not allowed. 

We have to wear 'bunny suits' like that in forensics lab at school. They are not comfortable.

I don't remember Raj's dad having white hair before...  Penny's dress is so pretty, and Dr. Koothrappali keeps telling everyone really unpleasant stories about marriage and how it always fails. Sheldon hates Christmas carols and thinks kissing Amy under mistletoe in public is akin to being on a 'Tijuana sex show'.

Howard thinks Leonard is jealous because they apparently used to be best friends before Raj came to town. When exactly was that? Raj finally stands up for himself.

Sheldon actually does love Amy, he notices all these adorable little details about her. But he wants to get her a gift as 'revenge' for making him celebrate Christmas.

You can never convince me that he is not just an overgrown child.

Penny and her sarcasm are bonding with Raj's dad. And they're actually trying to blow a ball of yarn across the table!

Howard can't handle the fire extinguisher. The blanket in their plan would have been more his speed. THEY KILLED THE PIGEON!! Horrible!!! (At least they can get rid of it now... Howard is a serial bird-killer. And now he's going to try to do CPR on it, and my inner germaphobe is cringing. But he does it! It's a Hanukkah miracle!!! ... But then they let a crow in. Smooth move, boys.

Penny has the solution - take their names off the sign-in sheet and leave! Sheldon hates raisins, but when he finds out they're figs, he's ok with it.

Amy loves her gift, and then it also plays a message in the frame - which Sheldon mouths along with. Turns out she got him a gift after all!! She made his Meemaw's Christmas cookies, which apparently 'taste like Meemaw's hugs'. And an onion ninja has apparently snuck into my house, because my eyes are watering like crazy.

AWWWWW!!!!!

And everyone hates Amy's theme dinner. Poor Amy.

NCIS: LA - Humbug

OK I missed the opening because I just got home from an exam... MEANING I AM FREE FOR THE CHRISTMAS BREAK!!! But I'm guessing it was things and excitement and whatnot.

Thank god for the Nell and Eric recap - Santas robbed a place with technology contracts to the government. Also, Granger is still recovering so I guess he won't be here to ruin anybody's fun. YAAAY!

Callen's girlfriend was a witness, they held a gun to her. Apparently this means they can't work on the case because she's not allowed to know who they really are. She's pretty. Deeks wants to poke and prod about what she's buying Callen for Christmas - apparently she thinks Callen has to wear a suit every day. I WISH!

Can't Callen always wear a suit?? I like suit-wearing Callen!!

Kensi freaks out briefly over the concept of the 'safe gift' - methinks she got Deeks a shirt and tie as well... And you know what, my parents have been married for 26 years, and that's all my mom gives him for Christmas.. and Father's Day... And his birthday. I think they're fine.

Deeks thinks the tech guy saying the word 'bustier' is creepy. I concur. They had malware that they were studying in order to figure out how to combat it, and it was stolen.

Eric is talking to a computer, calling it 'baby' and himself  'daddy' and Nell overhears him. Awks. Then she cancels their plans! Bad Nell! DOES SHE HAVE A SECRET BOYFRIEND?!!! No, she's going to visit her family. Thank god. OH MY GOD SHE INVITED HIM and he shocked himself. Side note: I would love to see the two of them hanging out outside of work like Sam and Callen do.

Look how cuuuute!!!

Deeks and Kensi are going snowboarding together for the holidays! Aww.. Everyone's cute and flirty except me. *Obligatory moment of self-pity*.

The guy Callen and Sam interview looks like he has a cloud attached to his head. His hair is that pale and fluffy.

Deeks lures one of the robber-Santas out of his house by smacking his crappy old car and setting off its dying alarm.  Then he finds another Santa in the house - looks dead but is just REALLY drunk. Deeks gets the honour of interviewing him - he's kinda cute but hilarious, keeps asking Deeks if he's the police. Also I looked up the guy who played him because he looked vaguely familiar, and OH MY GOD

This guy...

Was the voice of one of my favourite characters on one of my favourite childhood TV shows!!! RECESS!!!!

Callen tells Joelle he 'can't imagine what it's like' having a gun pulled on him. And I'm laughing. Turns out the flash drive that went missing ended up in Joelle's bag. The creepy 'bustier' guy from before was the one who hired the guys to rob the office and Hetty makes him really uncomfortable by sitting so close to him in interrogation. Now they're going to kill Joelle! Because this is the stupidest plan ever! Having a random oblivious third-party be the target?? And he found out who she was by looking at the store records?? What if she'd paid in cash?!! These bad guys are really stupid. Kensi strangles one of the bad guys just feet from where Callen and Joelle are dancing in her living room.

The other guy manages to break in because Deeks didn't get to him in time? Come on!!! They watched the guys walk up to the house!!

And the rules of statistics and physics are broken yet again - an automatic weapon misses them because a bad guy was using it! Naturally, Joelle freaks the hell out when Callen starts shooting back. And Kensi and Deeks couldn't have followed them into the house and helped him deal with the bad guy?!

Callen expects Joelle to be relieved that Sam's kids are 'just kids'. Even though her friends and boyfriend all have secret lives she didn't know about. She calls him a 'humbug', which means imposter. And tells him to leave. Sad Callen face.

Nell needs to stop saying cute things to Eric while he's holding electronics. He nearly blinded himself with his camera when she said he should pretend to be her boyfriend! I think she's a danger to his safety!! (But side note: AWWWWW!!!!!!)

Granger came back, but everyone was gone first. Grinch-ger will not spoil anyone's Christmas!!!

Unless his heart grows three sizes, that is.

They're all going skating - but Sam can't skate. Deeks didn't know they got a Christmas bonus. Kensi doesn't wanna just be 'safe', so no more games between her and Deeks and then they banter and make out and my heart melts. Like seriously, someone send an ambulance. Pool of liquid where there should be a muscle. Kind of an important one. I shouldn't go without that.

Michelle surprised Sam for Christmas by having Aiden come home - awww!!! And then Joelle shows up randomly, decides she wants to get to know the REAL Callen (asks about his last name hahaha long story) and they show Kensi with snow on her derriere - clearly she's fallen over a few times. I like the fact that I'm good at something she isn't, for once!!!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays NCIS: LA fans!!! See you in the new year!! :D

Saturday Night Live - Martin Freeman

It wasn't until 5:00 today that I remembered it's Saturday, and therefore SNL was on tonight...
I have no idea what day of the week it is anymore. Exams are the Britta of school.

They're the worst.

For that reason, my BBT blog is late this week, and my NCIS:LA one probably will be too. Sorry. And I may just fall asleep in the middle of this one.

The opening interview is with two guys (Bobby and Kyle, who finally gets to play an adult) who are the guys who invented all the torture methods for the CIA. They also invented the self-checkout lane at grocery stores, and the customer service at the cable companies. And auto-correct. Damn these guys.

Martin Freeman is adorable. He'd be perfect for an elf - doesn't even need the prosthetic ears! He proceeds to list every single role on his IMDb page... Except Sherlock, oddly enough... Give it up for racial unrest!! (No one does). Apparently all famous British people hang out together. I got really excited for a second that the real Maggie Smith would be there, but it's just Kate doing an impersonation - Taran got to do an Alan Rickman-worthy Snape. And yea, Maggie Smith is classy enough to wear the Downton Abbey costume as pyjamas. She's the best. And if Martin embarrasses himself, I'll need to change the title of this post to 'SNL - Colin Firth' hahaha.

Bow down to this woman. Do it. It's the law.

Keenan stars in a wannabe Digital Short piece called 'Sump'm Claus' about a dude who will give everyone some money even if they've been naughty enough for Santa Claus to cross them off his list. It's an odd concept, but I will say this - incredibly catchy.

Martin is like a head shorter than Leslie. Even moreso with her hair all pouffy like that. And they're getting married! By Beck. She's a basketball player, he's... tiny. All their wedding guests are objecting to them getting married. Apparently they have only known each other for five days. And have done it like 50 times. Then they fight when they're not... getting busy. And apparently he's already married. I'm so confused. The bride has a lot of kids (double three, plus four), and Kenan is her dad - who's the mother? Kenan is a LOT shorter than she is. Genetics. Apparently Martin lied and told her he was the king of England. but they're good. I think the bride's name is Alberta. And if so, that's the second time they've used that name for a character this season. Branch out a little - try another Canadian province. Nova Scotia, perhaps? Sooo a bunch more people object, then he says he 'needs his chocolate' and they are pronounced husband and wife without saying 'I do' or anything. There was like zero resolution to that sketch.

OH DEAR GOD HE'S WEARING THE HOBBIT COSTUME!! They're doing an Office parody, Middle-Earth-style. Bobby sounds nothing like Gandalf. And Taran is Gollum, which is such an insane disguise that I had to stare at him to figure out who it was. Kyle is Legolas. And he's cute, but c'mon, he's no Orlando. It wasn't a bad concept for a sketch.

Taran and Cecily are a couple with their own talk show and they all talk like stereotypical sassy gay men (including Cecily) and Martin is a handyman they're going to interview later on but they keep throwing to him, keeping the camera on him for an awkwardly long time, then talking about how cute he is. Then he dances for no reason. And Kate is playing Keith Urban, and Taran's license plate is apparently DRAMANQN.

Fauxmercial for church, and I'm just nodding and laughing - especially at the priest who alternates talking speeds, and the sweaty-palmed guy who gives the sign of peace. I'm not going to lie, my mom has definitely been that over-enunciating reader lady. And Kyle's a kid again.

MUUUUUUUUUUUUTE. I hate this song. And she's not wearing pants. They're probably supposed to be shorts, but they're white and puffy, so they kinda look like a diaper. Isn't she cold?? IT'S WINTER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! She also has like, zero facial expression. Which is weird.

OK I might just be going crazy because I'm so tired, but the announcer voice saying 'Weekend Update' sounded a lot less like Darrell Hammond and a lot more like Bill Hader. WHICH I WOULD LOVE BY THE WAY!! #HaderForSNLAnnouncer 
I noticed the price of oil was lower lately - it was like 96 cents (Canadian) a liter this week and everyone was freaking out. Sasheer is mad that there are no black people in emoji. She has a point. Especially that the moon face looks like a baby Charles Barkley. Colin does not understand their equations, so Michael has to translate.
Cecily is a one-dimensional female character from a male-driven comedy. She's discussing the lack of important female roles in Hollywood. And then she gets upset with Colin and he's really confused (although I think she's actually laughing). What record store?? And she took off her glasses!! So he noticed her! That was a good bit.

I don't see her...

Apparently Colin's high school yearbook picture got made fun of. But I think he's adorable (although I've seen the *after* photo, so I'm biased).

HAHAHAHAHA ok the hair's unfortunate. But that's a good solid chin. He grew into the chin.
And no one looks good in black and white.

 Hasn't this Jacob kid had his bar mitzvah 'recently' like 3 years in a row? Michael calls him on the fact that he doesn't actually have a lawyer. And then he starts crying about Derek Jeter. And can't high-five Michael properly.

Martin is training Taran on his first day at a new job (an assembly line that puts the labels on ketchup bottles) and literally all he has to do is move a lever. EASIEST JOB EVER. But Taran doesn't understand anything. "So I don't touch it?" "I'm miming!"
"Pull the lever when the light turns green, if it turns yellow push it back up." "Blue?" "There is no blue!" A little reminiscent of Who's on First. Also the slowest-moving assembly line ever. And then is turns blue! Oh no!

My TV has turned all stripey. Or maybe that's my eyes that have turned all stripey. They hurt. I've been staring at a sketchbook for the last 3 hours, and a computer screen studying for 3, then an exam paper for 2 before that. Ow.

Martin has hilarious hair. He's a saxophone player (reminiscent of Kenny G) in Kenan's lodge house band, and he has something weird going on with some dude named Roman in his personal life that he doesn't walk to talk about. During a performance, of a song with only like 6 words. Kenan was staying with him and there was a break-in and his red boots were stolen. They look like the boots from Kinky Boots. There was no resolution there either. What's up with that? (I wish...)

Wrong red boots. Wrong person whose name begins with a T. But they've both kissed Cobie Smulders...

MUUUUUUTE AGAIN. She's actually wearing pants now. But they have... Things hanging off of them. And she's flailing her arms and I'm afraid she's going to dislocate a wrist. Her guitar players (who I've just only now noticed are women in suits, rather than long-haired dudes) look very angry.

Martin is an over-enthusiastic waterbed salesman. Aidy is his jingle-singing wife, who is slightly cross-eyed and extremely overdressed. The Doritos clown is not a real thing. Aidy is awesome. Jay and Taran are shirtless, looking pissed and holding sparklers. Martin's American accent is really excellent. He reminds me 100% of Niles from Frasier. Uncanny.

Colin in a T-shirt again during the goodbyes. *Swoons*. Those arms are like tree trunks. In a good way. And now, I'm off to bed!

Bones - The 200th in the 10th

I am so incredibly excited for this episode. I love old movies, I love flashback/parallel universe episodes - Bones has done several of these before and they always do them WELL (remember the season 4 finale??)  - and it's their 200th episode so of course that's cause for celebration!!

This. All of this.

BTW - John Boyd (Aubrey) has a Twitter, it's right here! And I was watching Argo today, as a study break, and I found him in it!! It was very exciting - I wasn't even looking for him, he just kinda leapt out at me! (and then I remembered later on having seen on his IMDb that he had a small role in it).He had crazy sideburns and a yellow sweatervest. 'Twas adorable.

This is so cute, they're playing themselves as old movie stars, in a new movie called 'Bones'. I'm in love with this episode already. It's got everything!

Old-timey movie logo: check
Old-timey soundtrack: check
Old-timey car driving with what is clearly a green-screened background: check
Scarf around the hair: check
Wearing a trenchcoat: check
Old-timey revolver: check

Just look how happy they are!!

They're sneaking around a GIANT mansion - she's the one with the gun, he's climbing across all the balconies. Cam/Tamara is the maid (her short hair's back!) and Booth is a thief, he broke into the home's safe. Brennan/Emily is the police officer. There was a burned body in the safe.

Max is the police cheif, Angela's a receptionist - and NAILS her 50s-era voice, and then flirts with the adorable Wendell who's a press reporter. Awwww.

Asshole guy from INTERPOL has to replace her on the case, tells her she's 'easy on the eyes' and she responds with "You won't have any eyes if you keep talking like that." You go Brennan.

Did anyone in the 50s actually say 'guy'? Angela does. Bones does the old break-into-someone's-room-wait-for-them-in-a-chair-in-the-dark bit, and tells Booth to admit to the robbery so that they'll believe he didn't kill anyone.

HAHAHAHA Hodgins/TJ is a paleontologist, has tiny glasses, and Edison (his assistant) has slicked-down hair. Brennan is also full of surprises, and Booth needs a martini.

Couldn't find a better picture of Hodgin's glasses. But trust me. They were awesome.

The coroner doesn't care about the bones (silly man) and so they're able to easily steal them so that Hodgins and Edison can examine them.

Wendell is still flirting, he and Angela are teaming up to ask Vasiri (some jewel fencer) to help them prove that someone else had stolen the jewels. Angela is also bringing the sass that we saw from Brennan earlier. "Watch your step, Vaziri, unless you want to wear that drink". (He told Wendell to never try to understand a woman). LOVING THIS!

Wendell + old-timey hat = overload of cute. And check out that bow on Angela's dress!

Booth only gets to drive once he stops calling Brennan 'darling' (so, never).

Hodgins sounds like an old man. I'm loving it.
Requisite smoking vials of multi-coloured liquid, to signify that this is a lab and science happens here: check. 

CORRECTION I FOUND A BETTER PICTURE AND IT'S GLORIOUS.

Oh hey! Angela's dad makes an appearance too. He still has a guitar (albeit one made of trash - he's a hobo) and thinks Booth and Brennan are made for each other. Brennan thinks otherwise.

Hodgins being the bones expert and sounding astounded at all times is just the greatest thing.
Booth needs to stay at Brennan's house and she insists he can't go in her bedroom, she asks why, and he says "You've never let any man in there? Must be cold." She says a man has been slapped for less, then tells him to hide when Angela comes to the door - in the bedroom - and he gets all excited. Angela knows he's there, and gives Brennan some sass as well. AND THEN MENTIONS AUBREY!!! He apparently dated the victim.

*SQUEALS INTERNALLY*

Warren's on the stage, singing, at the club where they go to interview Aubrey, and Caroline's the hostess. Aubrey's adorable, denies knowing anything about the murder, and he's there dating Daisy of all people! Aubrey points out the singer and her backup.. something (dancer?), who are married, and he had an affair with the victim. So Booth starts a fight between them, then skedaddles when Angela's dad shows up out of nowhere and says the cops are there.

Somehow Jessica Warren (Rabbit?) manages to pull off the redhead-wearing-red thing. Also, she's an emoji.

Angela's dad - they're calling him Sarge - is apparently an Army vet, along with Booth, who served in WWII. Brennan suspects him. And the cops know they're working together, so they need to scram - whether Booth has finished his coffee or not.

Hodgins uses the victim's clothes to identify whether or not it was actually the lady who owned the house (she's not - plot twiiiiist!), they get Angela to draw the victim's face, and Aubrey says being framed for murder is a 'dreadful inconvenience', they trade some 'old sport's, and THEN SOMEONE FREAKING STABS AUBREY AND HE JUST GASPS AND FALLS OVER, Booth pulls the knife out of his back, and then someone takes a picture - oh no. Another dreadful inconvenience. But come on, did Booth not actually SEE the stabber?!! 

So much old-timey handsomeness in one picture.

Apparently Booth didn't want to keep thieving, and the people he robbed were those who profited off of the Nazis somehow, which is why he gave the money to his veteran buddies. Awwwe.

Hearing Hodgins tell Brennan 'the parietal - that's a bone in the head' is laughable. AAAAH PELANT!!! PELANT'S IN THE RESTAURANT!!! SOMEONE GET HIM!!!! OK I just realized that the husband of the lounge singer is Squintern Fuentes - I didn't recognize him with the horrible mustache hahaha.

Apparently the victim was killed a long long time ago, and the maid was the one who'd killed her - then stolen her identity, met Aubrey, and tried to abscond with the jewels.

They're shoved in a closet, act all 'we should try to escape' but then 'well maybe we should just make out first'. Hart Hanson pointed out that the light source in that closet is really flattering - and I concur. Cam is 'the one calling the shots here' and takes Brennan with her as a hostage instead.

Cam went to the Owen Granger School of Spoiling People's Fun.

Booth somehow escapes, uses the oldest-trick-in-the-book of using a pencil on the page below which something was written, to reveal the contours. He figures out where she's going.

Max believes Wendell, (which inspires a cute smile from Wendell) Hodgins calls Angela 'beautiful' and with that she's suddenly forgotten about all the flirting with Wendell earlier - BOO! Max calls the British guy a 'bombastic twit'. Best insult ever.

My bad. It's the second-best.

Old-timey plane: check

The pilot is stalling, then tells Cam that dumping a dead body will cost her extra. Well I would hope so!!

Booth arrives at the airport just before they take off, then decides to abandon his car because RUNNING after the plane is faster (clearly he's never watched Scorpion!)

This shot brought to you by the poster for North by Northwest - although this time, he's chasing the plane!

Then he leaps in the door as they attempt to take off with the door still open.
Cam calls him a chump, and falls over a few times, all I can think of is 'she's messing up her nice dress!' and then they all wrestle, including the pilot, who evidently doesn't need to actually FLY the plane while it's taking off. Brennan in her cloth bag almost rolls out the door - then Booth drops the jewels out the door, Cam decides they're more important than her own safety, so she falls out after them.

But OF COURSE Booth knows how to fly a plane! "This is why I like to drive". Hahaha

They make her detective, plus head of the new Forensic Science department - Wendell gets to take a picture, and Max predicts that they're going to fall in love, too. (Does no one want to catch the notorious jewel thief anymore?)

Brennan flips that 'darling' thing on its head. That's my girl. She found the jewels somehow - didn't those fall out over the mountains?? She decided not to tell the cops they were recovered, and instead gives them to Sarge.

And then our leads smooch under the stars. Awwwwe."For justice".

The End.

Bravo Bones, well done!! This episode was incredible. I loved the costumes, the hair, the dialogue, the cameos - EVERYTHING!! I really feel like watching some Hitchcock movies now. See you all in the new year!!!

Although, if we're bringing people back from the dead (I already knew John F Daley was too busy, poo) - BUT WHERE THE HELL WAS VINCENT?!!! OR ZACK?!!!! HE'S NOT EVEN DEAD!!!

Also it was trending at some point, so I tweeted this and then that tweet exploded when one of the writers retweeted it. Thanks guys!

NCIS:LA - Reign Fall

So I knew Daniela Ruah was married, but I had no idea who her husband was until I started following her on Instagram last week - his name is David and HE'S ERIC CHRISTIAN OLSEN'S OLDER BROTHER!!! So not only are they super-close coworkers, but now they're actually family!! How awesome is that!! David's also Eric's stunt double on the show - I bet he wishes he could be his makeout stand-in too... That must be a little awkward. Maybe he should go on Sarah Wright Olsen (Eric's wife)'s show Marry Me? And play her boyfriend? And they definitely must have met through the show, what an adorable little NCIS:LA real-life love story!!

This week is rare and exciting for me, because I'm at home for the holidays I get to watch with my dad! Which is fun! (Except for when he guesses the plot twist like halfway through...) Let's see if he has any interesting commentary...

Explosion prior to any dialogue, that's new... Sam has a Disney-themed party for his daughter, and they name-drop a bunch of characters (he calls Kensi and Deeks 'Lady and the Tramp', and Callen 'Goofy'). OK the first one was spot-on, but c'mon...

I don't see the resemblance...

Eric needs new catchphrases. Some lady named Nicole Borders (what a last name for a special agent) owned the house that was broken into - and the guy sneaking around was a paparazzo.

Callen is now guessing Batman villains (interesting considering Chris O'Donnell played Robin - twice) and Sam still won't budge. It takes him a while to get around to my original guess - the Genie from Aladdin. Sam in blue body paint? I'd like to see that!

Who remembers this?? Look at that suit...

The suspect they need to interview is basketball player, and an old friend of Deeks'. He thinks Kensi is 'baaaad'. Apparently he'd assaulted the paparazzi guy who ended up dead. Hence his 'suspect' status. Kensi has a point - it's kind of a conflict of interest to be suspecting one's best friend (sorry, second-best, after Monty) of murder. But he has an alibi. Thank god. Mr. Basketball player is also not very subtle - winking at Deeks right in front of Kensi.

"She baaaad." Pictured: Deeks and Kensi's best 'Are you serious' looks.

Nell says squinting is not actually bad for your eyes and I turned to my dad and said 'DID YOU HEAR THAT?!!' Thank you Nell! And she kissed Eric on the cheek and he didn't know what to say.

We meet the aforementioned Agent Borders, and she has a fiance who is apparently the one who sent the paparazzo to the empty house - it was on the market and he was just there to check on it. The fiance is also an army dude, and his son is at a military academy.

Callen and Sam have been sent to the military academy to retrieve the son, who is awkwardly formal and won't even refer to his dad as his dad - nope, gotta use the full name and ranking. We get some nice Sam and Callen banter (which Callen even acknowledges as well-done).

This dude is literally bent over backwards. Can't tell if that's because of his posture, or that backpack is too heavy.

Nell finds a link to a bunch of other crimes, and the killer had left behind something at each of them - jewlery, or a bottle of perfume (that revelation is what led her to kiss Eric's cheek earlier). All the victims were parents of children at the military academy. "It's the boy." says my dad. We'll see...

OK he's now withdrawn that theory, given that it might be a serial killer. Tsk tsk.

We learn some things about Sam's dad, and Callen asks if he wants to 'hug it out'. Hahaha. The team has a plan to 'draw out' the killer by using the Marine-dad as bait, since he was the intended target. He makes a snide comment about how Borders has 'the luxury of calling out an airstrike from miles away'. I don't foresee their engagement lasting very long... And oh hey! The stiff-as-a-board kid is capable of hugging!

Deeks goes undercover as an irritating barista, while Callen and Sam sit with the marine. He claims to have enrolled his kid in the military acedemy because 'discipline keeps him off drugs and out of a gang.' Riiiiight. Because forcing a child into the army is the only thing preventing them from being a drugged-out gang member. *Rolls eyes*. Why do adults think all teenagers do drugs all the time?

The marine guy, walking through a parking lot, is oblivious to a LOUDLY accelerating car that tries to hit him - until Callen is able of diving onto him and shoving him out of the way. Although Deeks later refers to the car as a 'sneaky hybrid', so maybe the noise was only for our benefit.

The guy, Richard, claims to have 'needed to take out evil men'. And he keeps muttering to himself. About how he's 'stupid' and 'it's too late'. Methinks Richard may be a little out of it, no? Or, as Deeks says 'a few crayons short of a full box'. I like that one.

Speaking of crayons, I had one of these as a kid. It was glorious.

Richard's father was in the military, as was his brother. The father was killed in combat, then the mother remarried and her second husband just disappeared. Callen manages to track down the mother and bring her to the boatshed in record time. She claims not to know where her other son is either, but then Sam tells her a story about growing up in a military household himself, and she admits to where he is.

They go to investigate his hiding place (an abandoned school that looks suspiciously like the military academy plus some rust - or do all California schools look the same?) and immediately get shot at. Sam pulls a hulk and dives through a window onto the guy. PLEASE TELL ME HE WENT TO THE PARTY AS THE HULK!!! Disney owns Marvel so that would technically still count!!!

It should be noted that this is the most elaborate costume my dad's ever worn. My mom made it.
For Halloween 2009. He was Lysol-man.

Side note - abandoned buildings are really cool. I would love to take up urban exploration. Except for this one - it contains a lab being used to build explosives. Uh-oh.

The second son thinks he's doing all the boys a favour by killing their fathers. He also alludes to having killed his stepfather, saying the guy 'got what he deserved.' Callen disagrees. Then Sam takes him into the explosives room, he steps on a pressure plate, and Sam threatens him so that he'll tell them who the next target is. Shockingly, Sam was bluffing, and the guy tells them who the target is, steps off the place in an effort to blow up Sam and Callen, then freaks out when there's no *BOOM*.

Kensi and Deeks find the next target - then they book it to his house because his son was on his way home, and wearing headphones so he didn't hear them yelling for him. And instead of, oh, I dunno, waiting for the bomb squad, Sam DIVES into the kid, shoves him into the pool and somehow the explosion totally misses them.

OH MY GOD Sam went to the party as Sully from Monsters, Inc. So I was pretty close with the 'giant blue' thing.  That's awesome.

Add a fireball in the background and you've got Sam this episode.

Where the hell was Hetty this episode? and Granger? And why was there just the one scene with Eric and Nell - although don't get me wrong, 'twas a good scene, I just feel like they were used as Google this episode.

Saturday Night Live - James Franco

My cousin was just saying that Keenan's getting too fat to play Al Sharpton - and then they addressed it hahah. Apparently the problem with the video of the Eric Garner case was that it wasn't high enough resolution. Oy.

I used to love James Franco, and you can't deny he's a good actor, but lately he's just gotten... weird. Also I don't like the short hair. And he's not cuter than his brother! Dave wins.
Oh hey! It's Seth Rogen!! Yaaaaay cameos!! That was a really short monologue.

Maybe because James can't read...

Oh thank god they're making fun of the live Peter Pan show. It's such a weird idea. Especially with a girl as Peter. And they brought back Aidy as Tonkerbell and it's hilarious. Franco's imitation of Walken as Captain Hook is actually really good! Good for him!

Tonkerbell is back.. And she has a boyfriend!

All the characters from Star Wars are really old.. And Han Solo left the Millennium Falcon's blinker on. I wasn't aware you had to signal a turn in a spaceship.

The next part is hilarious - it's an MTV Nativity scene - rappers as the 3 kings (Taran did an awesome Eminem, James as Sean Paul, Keenan as Rick Ross), Justin Beiber (Kate) as Joseph, and Beyonce (Nicki Minaj) as Mary. And then, of course, Kanye as Jeezus, and Jay actually made us all laugh.

I thought they fired Mike O'Brien? As an actor, at least. Why is he always in the pre-taped sketches? Beck is playing an asshole who keeps asking people uncomfortable questions, then Mike as to 'grow' a person to prove that he has another friend, and then train him to be a human... But they see through his identity because he asks about what the deal is with hashtags.

The next bit is about a pair of people stuck in the forest, trying to cross a bridge and the troll (James) who lives in the bridge wants to kiss them. But Kyle says he can't kiss Aidy, his fiancee, and Cecily steals the scene with her random character Kathy-Anne who lives with the bridge troll and complains about her life. So he kisses Kyle (I'm slightly jealous of either of them...) and then decides he's bisexual and I didn't really see a point of the whole scene.

UPDAAATE! They started with a bit about Michael pretending to be surprised about the details of the Eric Garner case. He suggested that they play the videos in photo-negative so that the victim would be white and the cop would be black. That's not a bad idea... Anthony Crispino thinks Mariah Carey sounded like Drew Carrey - and that 'he forgot whose line it was anyway, sooo...'
Then they bust out a poorly-timed Bill Cosby joke that even makes Michael Che uncomfortable. And Bobby's voice went pretty high on that, I was impressed by that, if not by the joke itself.
Leslie's back! Commenting on a new dating website set up to cater to stoners. She's telling Colin that she would try anything once, and that she's very 'open'. He actually laughed because he wasn't surprised. And Leslie keeps talking to him, called him a 'Peppermint Patty' and he keeps pressing his lips together to keeps from laughing - IT'S OK TO LAUGH, COLIN!
They then decided to have Nicki play Kim Kardashian. No one will ever top Nasim's impersonation!!! Apparently all her naked photos were supposed to be educational/public service announcements. And Colin enjoyed them.

Take notes ladies - this is how it's done. (With bonus Seth)

Pete has too much stuff in his brain to remember a new password. So James is directing various things to leave - like Kyle doing a great Chris Kirkpatrick impression doing the Bye-Bye-Bye dance. And Jay brings out his Will Smith impression to do the Fresh Prince theme. Nicki played herself singing only the first two lines of Anaconda. That was a pretty good sketch. I wish I could selectively throw things out of my brain so I could remember important things - like FOR SCHOOL!

Nobody needs the word 'rhombus', anyway.

James is playing a dude who's pissed off that a four-year-old beat him in an election for mayor. He apparently has bigger muscles than this kid - and hated Frozen and 'only thought the parts with Olaf were funny'. This guy's really intense - and then James started laughing. Priceless.

The not-porn-stars-anymore are back! And advertising yachts (which they pronounced yuck-its)
And James and Seth are the random dudes - Seth's character is named James Franco.  And they pronounce Sunseeker Yachts as Seersucker Yaks. Very nice. I don't get why they always put those sketches at the end of the episode - they're always funny.

This episode was hit-and-miss. But I love when Leslie interacts with Colin. She either makes him really uncomfortable or makes him laugh so hard. And I love it either way.

Bones - The Mutilation of the Master Manipulator.

Aubrey is a genius. And Booth has to do traffic school. With a condescending cartoon policeman. Sounds like the driving program I did... I have no idea why they make them like that. Anyone taking that program is at least 16! Not five!

Some children who were trying an insane stunt managed to help Bones find the skull, and Hodgins was impressed by them.

WENDELL'S BAAAACK!!! The victim was a professor who was on sabbatical and therefore not reported missing. And Bones thinks flowers are 'all wrong' and Aubrey is a genius again - high-pH of blood in soil can change the colour of flowers. Aubrey refers to the FBI as the 'super-police' and it's adorable.

Baby Wendell is done with the medication, and flirting with his nurse. So cute. She has a 'survey' she needs to ask him questions for - and the page is blank hahaha man I love his smile...

Feel that? That's your heart melting.

Kitty!! There was a kitty in the cupboard in the dead guy's house. Hodgins likes it. That's so sweet.

My boys!! Side note - Wendell is ROCKING that spacesuit.

And there's a video of a woman screaming on the victim's tablet - apparently his neighbours heard screaming. It was a psychological test about how long people would continue being obedient even if they were causing someone pain.

Hodgins uses some kind of crazy centrifuge to magically turn the colour of the flowers. It would smell amazing in that room right now. And he just casually draws his own blood for the experiment. I'm with Angela and Cam on this one - what the hell, dude?

I think Wendell's hair has gotten darker... Do people actually still go on picnics? And he loves science and cheesy 80s music. I love science and cheesy 80s music! Apparently making out requires the soundtrack of Foreigner's 'Waiting for a Girl Like You'. Must remember that...

One of the suspects is a student that was used in the experiment - he broke into the professor's house and blamed him for 'showing him that he was actually a sadistic monster' because he became a criminal after taking part in the experiment. Reeeally... Way to take responsibility for your own actions.

I actually kinda feel bad for this guy now that Aubrey's actually interviewed him - he feels really guilty about what he thought he'd done during the experiment. And then he was in a mental hospital for almost 2 years. That can't have been pleasant.

But good for Wendell, getting a girlfriend!! It's been too long! But now he's suddenly acting all awkward. And less enthusiastic than her.. because 'everything is happening so fast'. Damn it! Don't be that guy, Wendell! You're better than that!

Brennan even notices that Wendell's distracted (after he was 'smiling excessively the year before') Wendell plays reverse-God and says 'let there NOT be light' as he's adjusting his simulator. It makes me dizzy. The poor kitty wants to eat Hodgin's lizard. (Not a euphemism - he has a lizard in a cage in the lab next to the cat from the house).

One of the other students (who also had an affair with the victim) was expelled from school after he broke up with her. And she made an ugly sculpture which could have been the murder weapon. Ugh. Ugly sculptures.

OK sometimes when I'm not looking at the screen, I can't tell if it's Aubrey talking or Booth. This is so weird. Also the artist said art is 'freeing and cathartic' and Aubrey said 'yeah sometimes killers say murdering people is freeing and cathartic'. He's so clever!

Wendell's girlfriend keeps texting and calling him and now I feel kinda bad for her... Damnit Wendell! What are you doing!!

Booth teaches Aubrey that when Brennan talks all scienc-ey, you don't need to know what she's saying, you just need to nod and then wait for her to explain. Brennan got one of Booth's traffic questions wrong and then wants to argue with the cartoon Officer Stop-and-Go. Because, you know, she's never wrong.

Brennan's faith in her own intelligence is unshakeable.

The assistant/current girlfriend snuck into the victim's house, which is not at all suspicious. And Aubrey is bringing the sarcasm and I love it!!

Wendell's pestering girlfriend shows up at work. OK now I'm getting a little suspicious of her! It's been one day!! He's having issues but she's not reacting appropriately! And now he's starting to cry because he didn't want to get close to her and then have her see him die and this is turning into The Fault in Our Stars and I'm freaking out because (spoiler alert) the guy with cancer is the one who dies in that story!!! I just want to give him a hug...

She gives him a beautiful little speech about 'death just being part of the deal' and her aunt dying and then asks if PDA is ok in the lab (because everyone does it all the time anyway although she wouldn't know that) but Cam tells him off - making her a wee bit of a hypocrite - and he smiles and my heart melts again. Awww. You go, nurse girl!! He's back to smiling excessively!!

SOMEONE TRIED TO POISON THE CAT!! THIS IS NOT OKAY!!! And Aubrey and Brennan have apparently developed a shorthand. Booth is not pleased at being left out. Brennan thinks Aubrey's 'competent' and YES, that is a compliment!! Way to go!!!

He's officially Brennan (and Emily) approved!

The neighbour bird-watcher lady apparently is the one who did it, because the cat ate an endangered species of bird. That might have been motive to attempt and kill the cat (even though YOU DO NOT HARM KITTIES!!) but how the hell does that escalate to killing a person?!! Crazy bird lady is crazy!

Booth thinks Brennan 'drives like a grandma.' She's the 'Slow and the Serious', instead of the Fast and the Furious. I see what you did there, Booth. I see it and I like it.