Wednesday 28 March 2012

CSI - 'Malice in Wonderland'

I have given up complaining about puns in the titles of CSI episodes, but I will say this - Why are Miami's titles always more dramatic and serious? I thought Horatio was the lame-joke master? That should be switched around.
According the the promos, this episode is very trippy (weird timing, given Dr. Park's LSD-induced adventure on House a few weeks ago, but whatever) so I may need to stop if the colours give me a headache XD
OMG it's a wedding this is totally hilarious, and the catarpillar is the preist :P HOLY SHIT I will never look at the Cheshire Cat the same way again O.O he's shooting, along with the rabbit. Oh ny god they killed the groom/Mad Hatter that's so sad :(
Nick is such a sweetie talking to one of the witnesses...
And that poor bride! She says it's her fault that everything happened, cos Andrew (the victim) was just trying to protect her, and he saw her right before the wedding, which is bad luck! When I get married, I'm hiding in a closet until it's time to walk down the aisle, I don't want that crap happening!!
Lol Hodges needs a fake girlfriend to introduce to his mother.. He was dating Wendy tho! But then she left :/
And wtf? The guy was shot with a button?? Weird! Unless it was on his hat, and the bullet bounced off it but the button was forced into his head?
The catarpillar is actually a convicted felon lol, asks Sara if she's married (and for a second I was thinking 'no she's not' O.O Sorry Grissom!) and he says the robbers were very efficient, knew exactly what they were doing. But I've been wondering - why choose that wedding to rob? They weren't super-rich, other than the theme there was nothing in particular to say it was a fancy wedding where they could steal lots of valuables. Sara says that those robbers have definitely done it before.
And then we see some rich old man and a young lady in a car at one of those drive-thru wedding places, and I'm thinking 'oh crap I know where this is going'. Big black SUV pulls up behind them, as they're saying their vows we see a guy get out and start to walk around the car - suddenly there's one robber on each side of the car and they take all their stuff and their car. At least they didn't hurt anyone. Russell says those guys are starting to piss him off lol. And I think the couple is gonna start arguing about the value of the car and stuff (the ring was worth like $500,000!) and break up...
Lol Mandy is so helpful, getting Hodge's mother a full-access pass to the lab XD and she thinks he's more important than he is - then Morgan steps in and smooches him on the cheek hahaha he looked shocked but she's such a good actor! Especially considering she hates him even more than Mandy does!!
Wow the robbers used a WW2 weapon! Insane! And I was right! The button was from his hat!! Mwahaha!!! But the gun was loaded with blanks, and it was just the force of the blank round being fired, cos the gun was so close to his hat, which caused the button to become a 'projectile by proxy' as DB put it. So I guess the robbers didn't really intend on killing anyone! O.O
DB pointed out, too, what I did earlier (we are on the same wavelength, he and I) that the weddings seemed to be picked at random, because they were so different. Then Finn figures out the common denominator - the ring.
The lady at the jewelery store (who I'm pretty sure played Hotchner's wife on Criminal Minds) tells them that the ring is super-expensive but special, so there would be no way of reselling it because it's completely unique, everyone would recognize it. She also says that the woman who was marrying the old man has been in the store several times, buying various rings with various different men. Greg confronts her with the fraud story, and she admits to it but tells him she actually wanted to marry the last old guy.
And LMAO this is hilarious - Hodges' mom called up Ecklie to go to brunch with her and Hodges and Morgan - apparently he was 'excited, albeit a bit surprised'
Someone killed the Cheshire cat! They were melting down the stolen gold (so it would be untraceable) and then someone poured the molten gold down his throat - which is making me gag. But evidently he wasn't one of the partnership, which they somehow figured out based on the fact that it was fake gold down his throat (more gagging).
And duuude Hodges' mother is Jaclyn Smith!! As in, one of the original Charlie's Angels! And this brunch is super-awkward but incredibly hilarious and the women left Ecklie and Hodges alone teehee
OMG these guys are pros! They committed 3 consecutive robberies in Chicago, and 3 more in New York at a different time - holy shit the one guy was an ambulance driver so they knew how to avoid traffic, and nobody thought twice about seeing them! I actually had that thought once we saw him at the beginning lol, I was like 'what if that guy is in on it?' And he's married to the lady from the jewelery store (where, conveniently, Mrs. Hodges and her son are currently looking for an engagement ring (her idea). Uh-oh Hodges realised the connection between the denture cleaner found on the fraud lady's dress - they use it to clean rings at the store, and then he mentioned something about it and the wife pulled a gun and the other guy showed up and they are so creepy, especially her with her huge eyes looking like a cartoon character on crack. And then she shoots the security guard, just to prove they're not using blanks anymore! Why not just shoot Hodges, geez that move made no sense.
They all got to the jewelery store in time, the guard is ok, but the bad ambulance guys have a radio, meanign they know exactly where all the cops are. And Hodges is telling his mom that he's super-pathetic and then says 'I can't save us, all I have is a love for my job, and a very thorough knowledge of the physical limitations of duct tape' and he rips the tape off his hands and uses the fancy medicine to knock out the wife and grabs her gun. YAAAAY HODGES!! And thank god, Morgan figured out the radio and there are a whole bunch of cops blocking off the real ambulance. And everyone is OK :)
They found Alice's ring and Finn gave it back to her which makes me kinda sad because I'm sure she would rather have her fiance back alive than that ring :'( And awe they had an Alice-themed funeral too it's so sad

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