SNL - Jeremy Renner & Maroon 5

Oh nooo they're opening with a sketch about the biographer who wrote a book on, and then slept with, the director of the CIA... I'm pretty sure this is gonna be full of innuendos! Or descriptions of makeout sessions lol ... And the audience she's reading it to looks utterly shocked and disturbed haha and then a bunch of them leave, except for Fred of course, he's enjoying it too much -.-
Jeremy Renner, I know almost nothing about this guy other than the fact that he played Hawkeye in the Avengers (half of which I slept through..) but apparently he can sing! He made up a theme song for the Avengers which he tries to play - and the piano doesn't work XD That's definitely the funniest messup I've EVER seen on SNL!! And a ripoff of 'Use Somebody' by Kings of Leon, called 'shoot somebody'... And then a song that sounds an AWFUL LOT like the Europe song 'Final Countdown' - and then he yells 'it's Mission Impossible!' but that song was for The Town HAHAHA
Then a faux-mercial for people who go and visit their old hometowns hahah 'you could go on a day trip - to the new Kmart' and their parents are overly clingy, of course
OMG The Californians!! This sketch hahaha... They did it pretty recently tho, I'm surprised they're doing it again! Bill-as-the-blonde-construction-worker tries to teach Vanessa-as-the-Spanish-maid to speak English and he has 'one more word to teach her... Love' and they make out! OMG FRED AND JEREMY STARTED LAUGHING HAHAHA this episode is full of hilarious screw-ups!! Also, Fred's character knocked someone up at an Eagles concert lol

The Situation room!! I have no clue who the real Wolf Blitzer is, but I love Jason Sudekis' impersonation of him lol he sounds to stiff! And so they're talking about this girl named Jill Kelly who reported the affair they talked about in the first sketch... They only have 1 clip of her, of her walking down the stairs down the street and getting into a car. And then they have a seperate photo of her, and Bobby as a reporter standing across the street from her house 'so far she hasn't replied to any of the questions I shouted at her house' LMAO and then there's a 'CNN dramatization' of the same clip, only it's Tim in a dress walking down the stairs in a dress lol

Apparently this is Wolf Blitzer. I like Jason better!

This next sketch was so weird but had me laughing so hard - it starts off with Bobby, Taran and Jeremy standing in a parking garage, each pointing a gun at each of the other 2 and then Jeremy says 'I gotta go pick up my kid from dance class' and they go there, go home, sleep, and do a bunch of other stuff (including Thanksgiving dinner haha and SKATING!) while pointing the guns at each other! Then they're walking down the street and a guy comes up to them and says 'hey where's-' and they point the guns at him and he has his own guns aimed at them and IT'S ADAM LEVINE!!! Then they give him directions and he leaves and they all go 'that was Adam Levine!' Damn I love him lol.. Then they're all back in the parking garage and Bobby says 'this was the best 2 days of my life' and THEY BOTH SHOOT HIM!! Damnit I hate when they do that... Then Taran says he has to let his cats out lol and they walk off slowly, still pointing guns at each other!
MAROON 5!!! I told you all I was super-happy about them being on today, I especially love it when Adam makes guest appearances in the various sketches lol. But THIS SONG is just incredible, I love their whole album - my aunt gave it to me for my birthday and I haven't been able to stop listening to it!!! It's a perfect mix of incredible ballads and super-catchy songs that make me want to dance..

Buy it. The album cover is weird, but it's incredible.

WEEKEND UPDATE WOOT!!! Lots of jokes about the Petraus scandal, 'Loser of this scandal: people trying to get away with an affair in the digital age. The director of the CIA could not get away with it. You have no hope.' LMAO
Katt Williams is a pimp - I have no clue who he is haha but he's pleading 'pimp' and looks like Snoop Dogg with a flipped-up hairdo...
Also how is it even possible to have a lying competition???? So weird. And WOAH that's the real Chris Christie! And hey, he's being mean to my boy Seth!! I know Seth wrote it himself, but you can't talk to him that way!!

Why would you want to be mean to him?? He's so damn cute!!

I KNEW they were going to parody the Avengers haha (glad they also pointed out that they have stupid words for the simple phrase 'aliens are attacking New York') - and I was wondering why Hawkeye is considered a superhero when all he does is have a bow & arrow lol - also the Black Widow, she's just someone with a gun... LMAO he's out of arrows.  He can't just pull one out of an alien he's already killed, cos that's not sanitary hahaha and Hulk found an arrow, but then Hawkeye fist-bumps him and breaks his bow-pulling hand!!

What good does a gun do against robot-aliens????!!!!!!

There's a sketch about a knockoff Vin Deisel guy named Dick Fuel lol played by Jason who is in a movie playing 'Thug Number 2' in a movie with Jeremy and he keeps overriding Bill the director.. And he always wants juice, and pudding haha then he keeps stopping Jeremy from slapping him like he's supposed to do.. Then he punches Jeremy lol.. How does Jason always play really annoying characters and yet I still love him haha
Maroon 5 is back!! Singing their next single, 'Daylight', which I just ADORE, it's so melodic and beautiful.. And between that one and 'One More Night', I think that's pretty much a perfect representation of their album! Except he sounds kinda tired singing live right now O.o He's not like that on the album, I swear!!
I have no clue what's happening in this next sketch, it's animated and I don't at all recognize the voices lol. It's all about how cool fighter drones are lol and apparently they're also a boy band haha I am so confused... Wait there's Bill's voice I am slightly more relieved. Then they sing while they're on a mission to kill terrorists lol that was just strange. And then they kill a goat!! Why does SNL does this so often?? Who do they think they are, MAD TV?!
OK a sketch in a morgue where a guy Jeremy is with a cop and has to identify a body of his brother, they pull the sheet of his face and he goes 'that's Steven Tyler' and they're all like 'wha-?' then they pull the blanket back and he goes 'it's Yao Ming!' HAHAHAHAHA then he thinks it's the cop, Jason, and Bill the coroner is getting impatient and starts drumming on the body - Jeremy says 'hey bro' and the body sits up, turns out he's not dead after all LMAO then Bill goes 'he said he was dead!' and Jason looks at him like 'SERIOUSLY?!' OH MY GOD That was so good hahaha what a way to end the show!!
Wow apparently today is Lorne Michaels' birthday! And Nasim's! And last week sometime it was Vanessa Bayer's! Lots of SNL babies in November haha